


Smoke and Mirrors

by Donovanspen



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Case Fic, Cold Weather, Developing Relationship, Dubious Consent, Fake/Pretend Relationship, Human Castiel, M/M, Protective Dean Winchester, Sharing a Bed, Slow Build
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-02-23
Updated: 2015-06-21
Packaged: 2018-03-14 17:26:24
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 19,998
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3419264
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Donovanspen/pseuds/Donovanspen
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sam and Dean head to the Poconos to investigate strange occurrences at an inn that specializes in romantic getaways.  However, nobody's talking and the only way to get access to the inn is as a guest. Unaware that Dean and Cas have been deliberately avoiding each other, Sam asks Cas for help.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

“I think it dropped another twenty degrees,” Dean complained as he shuffled through the motel room door, juggling several bags of groceries. 

Sam looked up from where he was sprawled on the sofa, his broken leg propped up on some pillows. “Is that all food?”

Dean nodded to the white cast covering Sam’s calf and foot. “Wasn’t sure how long this was going to take, and I didn’t want to leave you stranded here with no food.” He began unpacking the bags, stocking the cabinets and refrigerator of the small kitchenette. 

“I turned up dead ends all day, and I’m guessing you didn’t find anything, either.” That was the way their luck had been running for this case. They were in a small resort town right along the outskirts of the Poconos, following up on a tip from Charlie. Unfortunately, there was no hard evidence, and the residents of the small town either didn’t know anything or weren’t talking. “How do we know this is even a case? Her friends signed up for a retreat, and then they went and did what they signed up to do. How is that a case?”

“Charlie said that they were all over the map emotionally, sometimes brutally honest, sometimes arguing, just acting out,” Sam explained again.

“Yeah, but doesn’t that happen sometimes? Couples fight and make up.”

“Maybe more so at a couple’s retreat or workshop or something, not at a romantic getaway. No, it sounded more like something was maybe influencing them. And I don’t think it’s a coincidence that I slip on a patch of ice on the inn’s front sidewalk, right after I tried to question them.”

“So, you’re thinking trickster or witches?” Dean asked. 

“Or a rogue cupid.”

Dean let out a curse at the possibility of coming up against angels again. “Looks like I’ll be paying them a visit, but I doubt they’ll be any more helpful than the other residents up here.”

“I’m thinking the same thing so I got you a reservation at the inn. This way, as a guest, you’ll have access to the entire place, and it won’t seem suspicious. However, I don’t think you should go alone.”

Dean gave him a pointed look. “I think I’d rather take my chances than have you hobbling after me.”

“Same here, which is why I called Cas.”

“No.” The word slipped out before he had a chance to even think about what Sam had just said. He hadn’t seen Cas for six months, not since he used his recovered grace to burn the mark off his arm, and still, it was too soon. It could have been just yesterday with how raw he was still feeling.

“I can’t watch your back, and the only way to get close to that place is to check in as a guest. And if it is a cupid, Cas could only help,” Sam argued.

“Cas is out of the game. We don’t have the right to call him back in.”

Sam shook his head. “Cas isn’t out. What made you think he was?”

Dean faltered as Sam’s words sunk in. “He told me that he needed to take a step back. That’s why he left.”

“Maybe he figured things out and decided to get back into hunting. Anyway, I called him earlier this morning, and he’s on his way. Should be here in a couple of hours or so.”

Dammit, Sam.”

His brother was quiet for a moment, a frown turning down the corners of his mouth. “Is there something I should know?”

“Like?” There was a bit of an edge to his voice. He needed Sam to leave this one alone. 

“You tell me, Dean.”

“It’s nothing. I just think we can handle a case that doesn’t even sound like a case.”

“And I don’t like being lied to. Ever since he removed the mark, Cas has been keeping his distance, and you act like you don’t want him around.”

“Sam, will you just trust me and let it go? There’s nothing going on. Cas wanted some space to figure things out, and I’m giving it to him. Come on, he busted his ass to get his grace back and then burned it out removing that damn mark. That’s a pretty big pill to swallow.”

“Forgive me if I’m a little skeptical, Dean. The last time Cas stayed away from the bunker, you were keeping some pretty hefty secrets. But if you say it’s nothing, then … I believe you.”

Dean rubbed his temples and tried to shake off the frustration that was building. It was his fault that Sam was wary, and he deserved an explanation. They’d promised each other no more secrets. “It was his grace, all right? When he healed the mark using his grace, I think I got more than he bargained.”

“What do you mean?”

“I could feel the grace burning away the mark, but after all the pain subsided, I could just feel Cas. It was like getting a glimpse of his soul or something. I felt what he felt for me.”

“You could read his mind?”

“No, it was more like emotions coming through. Since he was focused on healing me, his feelings for me were kind of front and center.”

“How’d that go? Was he angry that you knew? Is that why he left?”

“No. He left because instead of thanking him for burning out his grace on me, I told him that I didn’t want what he felt and pushed him away.”

“Ouch.”

“Yeah, go ahead. Call me an ungrateful dick or whatever.”

“Did you mean it?”

“I did at the time,” Dean admitted. “There’s no way I deserved that type of devotion.”

“And now?” Sam prompted.

“I probably still don't, but it’s Cas,” he said as if that explained everything. “We’ve lost too many people already. I didn’t want him to leave, but I needed some time to get my head screwed on. I tried reaching out to him a couple of times, but he said that he needed some time to adjust to being human again so I left it alone.”

“Man, I’m sorry. I didn’t know.”

“Yeah, well, wouldn’t expect you to. We’ll get in there, work the case and see where we stand.”

“Ah, damn. We might have a problem.”

“With what? He already said he was coming, right?”

“I managed to get you into that inn, but the reservation is part of a romantic couples getaway.”

“A what? And you didn’t think that was something you should have mentioned earlier?”

“Not really,” Sam replied with a shrug. “I thought you knew. I mean, that’s the case, after all.”

“Fantastic.” His first time seeing Cas in months and it had to be under the guise of being a couple. 

“It’s not like you guys have to be all over each other. Most people aren’t big on public displays of affection.”

“Yeah, except for those that take romantic vacations together.”

Sam gave him a sheepish smile. “It was the only way to get you access to the inn.”

Dean knew that he was right, and normally, it wouldn’t be a big deal. He could put on a pretty good show when needed, but with everything that had happened with Cas, he wished there was another way. “Yeah, you’re right. We’ll make it work,” he said, trying to project a confidence he didn’t feel. 

 

It was close to midnight before Cas finally showed up. Dean answered the door and felt a rush of relief to be able to finally lay eyes on him again even though he wasn’t pleased with how run down his friend appeared. He knew Cas was human now, but the only times he’d seen him looking worn and fatigued had been when the angel was in a bad way. 

“Dean. Sam. I got here as fast as I could.”

“Cas. You look beat. Did you drive straight through?” Sam asked, his face reflecting Dean’s concern.

“I wasn’t sure the extent of your injury and thought it best to get here sooner rather than later.”

“Thanks but you shouldn’t have pushed it. We’re in a holding pattern until tomorrow so we’ll start fresh then.” Dean motioned him towards a chair.

Cas hesitated. “I should probably get a room then.”

“We’ve got plenty of space,” Sam offered. 

“Yeah, go ahead and take a load off, and I’ll make you something to eat.”

“I wouldn’t want to impose.”

“Seriously, it’s no problem. Dean just stocked the kitchen, and there are two queen beds in the other room, and this sofa folds out,” Sam assured him. 

“Very well. Thank you. I would like to take a shower, if I could.”

“Yeah, sure. Go ahead,” Dean told him. He went over to the kitchen and began pulling out the bread and meats as Cas headed off to the bathroom. Being with Cas again felt familiar, but he could still feel the distance that time and circumstances had created. It spoke volumes that Cas had come when Sam called. Dean suspected that Cas would always be there to help them, but he didn’t think that was going to be enough anymore. Cas had never been a permanent fixture in their day-to-day lives, but he had never really been gone, and that used to be enough. Not anymore, though. There was no big mission keeping Cas on the road, no reason that he couldn’t be at the bunker. 

“He looks wiped,” Sam commented. “Do you think he’s ok?”

Dean shrugged. “He did say that he drove straight through.”

“I think it’s more than that,” Sam persisted. “We’ve seen him get by as a human before, but he never really talks about how he’s doing. When he checks in, he doesn’t say much about where he’s staying or how he’s getting along. I get that he needed some space, but it never really made sense to me why he stayed away.”

“Well, now you know.”

“You were lying, weren’t you?”

“About what?”

“About not feeling the same way.”

“I wasn’t lying,” Dean said with a shake of his head. 

“Come on, man. He was in the room for five minutes, and you’re already hovering. I mean, you guys always used to have this close bond, but now, it’s like you’re not even trying to hide it.”

Dean glanced over at the bedroom door, confirming that Cas was still in the bathroom. “I wasn’t lying,” he insisted, lowering his voice until it was just barely above a whisper. “The things I did when I had that mark, you know what it’s like. It took a while to shake off that heaviness.” And truthfully, he still had some bad days. 

“And now?”

“I don’t know that I deserve anything good. But I don’t want this, either. We’ve fought too hard and lost too much. He should be with us.”

“Well, then, I guess it’s up to you to convince him.”

“Why not you?” Dean asked. “You’ve been talking about rebuilding the Men of Letters. Who better than Cas?”

“Cas would be perfect, but apparently, he’s not staying away because of me.”

“Yeah, well, he hasn’t exactly been chatty with me,” he griped, setting a plate and bottled water on the table. 

“Well, he’s here. That’s gotta count for something.”

Yeah, it definitely counted, Dean thought. And he wasn’t about to blow this opportunity.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Unbeta'd so all mistakes are mine. Please feel free to let me know of any typos, and I'll gratefully correct them.
> 
> (I don’t own anything related to Supernatural. Just having fun writing stories.)

The inn was located a few miles outside the small town. Dean spent the drive time going over some of the smaller details that Sam hadn’t mentioned. He was mostly trying to get a feel for what Cas was thinking. He hadn’t given any reaction to the ‘couples’ aspect of the job other than to nod and say “all right.” And as much as Dean wanted to believe it, he didn’t think it would be that easy. 

It wasn’t long before he saw the turnoff for the inn, a picturesque house surrounded by powdery white snow and decorated to resemble a winter wonderland. The property was 10 acres of wooded landscape with the inn nestled in a clearing uphill from a small pond. The building was a large three story structure with a wrap around porch and parking off to the side. Several cars were in the lot along with a passenger van with the name printed on the side. 

A series of jingle bells tinkled when they opened the door, and they were soon greeted by an older lady with gray hair wearing a white apron with red hearts printed on the front. “Welcome. Can I help you?”

“Uh, yeah. We’re here to check in. We have a reservation for the week.” Dean gave her a broad smile as his eyes took in their immediate surroundings. The interior of the wooden homestead was just as quaint as the exterior. Decorative wreaths and other crafts were hung on the walls, knick knacks and figurines adorned shelves and tabletops, and the air smelled of cinnamon and other spices. 

“Oh you must be Dean and Cas. We got your reservation yesterday. I’m Marjorie. If you’ll follow me, I’ll get you checked in, and then you can get settled.” She motioned for them to follow her into a side room off the foyer. 

“Please have a seat and help yourselves to some refreshments.” Marjorie placed a paper and pen on the table. “If you could just review this and make sure everything is correct and then sign the bottom.”

Dean glanced over the paper, making sure it matched the cover story Sam had provided. He initialed the paper and slid it back towards Marjorie, who in turn handed him a set of keys. 

“Here you go.” She smiled again. “You’ll be in the Lover’s Lane room at the end of the hall on the second floor. This key is for the front door. We lock up at 11pm so you’ll need that if you’ll be out later. This is a list of our rules and guidelines. Meals are served buffet style in our dining room. We offer a variety of options, and we can address any dietary restrictions if necessary. Room service is available if you find yourselves… otherwise occupied. We do a daily light housekeeping unless you leave the do-not-disturb sign on the door. Here is the list of all the activities that are available. Just let us know each morning if you’d like to do something, and we’ll make the arrangements.”

Dean scanned the information, noting that they’d be pretty busy if they tried to do everything. Many of the options seemed centered around the local winter activities with romantic overtones added: a day at the ski lodge followed by an evening in the hot tub and a private dinner in your room; ice skating at the town’s outdoor rink coupled with lunch at a local cafe; horse-drawn carriage ride. Charlie mentioned that her friends had gone for the full package, but Dean was hoping that they would make some headway before having to do any of this stuff. 

“Thank you. We’re really looking forward to our time here. Cas really loves this stuff.” He nodded to the other man who’d spent the entire time checking out the display of small wooden statues on the corner shelf. He gave Marjorie his best smile but could see that she was now focusing her attention on Cas who hadn’t made any effort to interact with them at all. 

“Hey Babe, I think we’re all checked in here.” Dean took a few steps towards Cas and grabbed hold of his hand. “He gets so focused that sometimes the rest of the world just melts away.” He gave his hand a slight squeeze.

“Um, yes. I was just admiring the craftsmanship. I apologize for getting distracted.” Cas gave her a small smile.

The cautious look gone, Marjorie returned his smile. “Oh no, that’s fine. We’ve tried to create an enjoyable atmosphere for our guests. I’m glad it captured your attention.”

“Yeah, our friends, the Danvers, were here last month, and they really liked it. After listening to them, we knew we had to come.” Dean dropped the name of Charlie’s friends, but Marjorie gave no reaction other than seeming pleased with the referral. She kept up a steady stream of chatter as she led them up to their room.

Dean had released Cas’ hand a while ago, but now he wrapped an arm around his waist knowing that Marjorie was watching as they entered the room. 

“Babe, this is awesome,” he announced as he closed the door. 

Cas pulled away as soon as the door latched shut and began checking the room. 

It was hard not to take Cas’ withdrawal personally, but they had a case to work. He did his own check of the room while taking in the overpowering message that this room was for lovers. The queen-sized bed was draped in soft linens and fluffy pillows with soft, plushy throw rugs on each side of the bed. Scented candles were on the dresser next to a large serving tray with a bottle of wine, glasses and chocolate covered strawberries. A quick look in the bathroom revealed a large soaking tub and an assortment of bath beads. And the only device in the room that required a remote control was the gas fireplace. “So, what do you think?” he asked, hoping that the decor wouldn’t make things any more awkward between them. 

“The room is clear. With the various items that she has accumulated, it could be a cursed object. The directed focus on romantic feelings could suggest a goddess or spell.”

“Yeah, we thought of those. Marjorie seemed a little uneasy when you weren’t by my side and we didn’t appear to be a happy couple. Guessing the romance thing is the key.”

“Most likely. I can definitely sense something, but it’s too faint for me to tell what it is. There is the possibility that we’ll be ineffective as we’re not really a couple,” Cas pointed out. 

It was possible, but Dean felt that their affection for each other was strong enough to get them close to whatever was going on in this place. Cas had always appeared to have deep feelings for him, so much so that Dean had been able to pick up on them. He was fairly certain that Cas hadn’t had a change of heart over the past six months. 

He took a seat on the bed and couldn’t help but groan and lie all the way back once he felt how luxurious it was. “Dude, you have got to try out this bed. It feels amazing.”

Cas moved closer but stopped short of the bed. 

Taking the hint, Dean sat up. “All right.” He motioned for Cas to come and sit beside him. “Let’s take a look at this list of events and see where to start.”

 

They decided the best approach was to start with the inn and the grounds. They explored all of the common area rooms in the house with Cas paying particular attention to the decor as they looked for anything unusual. Unfortunately, they had to appear as guests and could only spend a small amount of time looking around, just enough to rule out anything obvious. 

After checking out the main house, they walked the yard, and then headed down to the pond and up back towards the tree line. Dean wished they could have split up to cover more ground, but he knew that it was important to maintain their cover so they stayed together, often shoulder to shoulder as they trudged through the snowy landscape. After two hours of not finding anything, Dean suggested they head back in. Cas looked as if he was freezing in his light jacket, although he insisted he was fine every time Dean asked. 

They returned to the house in time to have dinner with some of the other guests. They took a seat at a small table for two in the back corner of the dining room. Three other couples were already there, sitting at their own tables, heads together, laughing intimately. 

“Damn, this is good,” Dean muttered after taking his first bite. The inn may not be his usual first choice for lodging, but the food and rooms were first rate. He glanced up and saw that Cas was pushing his fork around his plate while giving the room his squinty-eyed attention.

“Hey. You ok?”

“I’m fine.”

“Well, you look like you want to smite everyone in the room. You still cold?” 

“A little,” he finally admitted as he looked over and met Dean’s gaze. “But I can still feel something.”

“You mentioned that earlier. Is it like an instinct? Do you still have some of your grace?”

“I don’t know. I can feel something, a power or presence, but then it fades like it was never there.”

“Like a spirit?” They hadn’t really considered the possibility that a spirit could be haunting the inn. They hadn’t come across any mysterious or violent deaths. 

“No. It seems more like a build-up of power, like the change in the weather before a storm.”

“Have you felt this before?”

Cas frowned. “Earlier today when we checked in.”

“No, I mean, can you sense other stuff when you’re hunting? You are hunting, right?”

Cas fiddled with his fork, pushing the food around and keeping his focus on his plate. “Are you angry?”

The question seemed innocent enough, but Dean wasn’t sure he wanted to touch that can of worms right now. He glanced around the room and saw that some of the other couples were looking their way. And there was Marjorie, hovering in the doorway. Remembering their cover, he reached across the table to take hold of Cas’ hand, only for Cas to startle and jerk back, dropping his fork onto his plate with a loud clang. 

“Relax,” he hissed, trying to give Cas a reassuring smile, which probably came across more like a grimace. 

“Sorry.” A red flush colored Cas’ cheeks and throat. Dean felt a rush of affection. Flustered was a good look on Cas. 

They made it through dinner without any further incidents, but it had been an uncomfortable affair. Despite their claim to be a couple, Dean could tell they were coming off as stiff and unbelievable. Oh, he could smile and charm his way through anything, but it wasn’t enough to cover Cas’ awkwardness. As much as he would have liked to return to their room, he knew that he would have to do some damage control if they wanted the other guests to loosen up and talk with them. Dessert was being served in the great room while a local string trio was scheduled to play for the evening. He figured that was as good a place as any to start. 

Dean took a seat on one of the love seats to wait while Cas checked out the library. The trio wasn’t scheduled to begin for another fifteen minutes, and other guests were moving about the room so he figured they still had time. 

“Anniversary or doghouse?”

“Excuse me?” Dean looked over at the lady who had just sat down next to him. 

“Most people come to these getaways to celebrate their anniversary or get out of the doghouse. After seeing you with your man at dinner, I’m guessing doghouse.”

Dean latched onto the excuse and did his best to look a bit sheepish. “Yeah, it’s a little rough patch, but he’ll come around. It’s our first night here, so it can only get better. What about you? Anniversary?”

“Good call,” she smiled. “I’m Erica.”

“Dean. So, where is…?”

“Dane. And he’s upstairs. We’ve been here for a few days, and I think we’re going to have an early night. We spent the day on the slopes, and plan to head back again tomorrow. I just wanted dessert. They make the best pies and cakes. We come every year, and I gain at least ten pounds from all the wonderful food.”

“Every year? Guess this place made an impression.” Dean hoped that Erica would keep talking and maybe he could catch his first lead. 

“Every year,” she confirmed. 

“Wow, this place must be something special.”

Erica flashed him a knowing smile. “It can be very freeing if you let it. Don’t be shy. Take advantage of the stuff offered here. Act on your instincts.” She nodded her head, causing Dean to glance over his shoulder. He was far from being a prude, but he was completely caught off guard by the couple aggressively making out on the couch behind them. 

“Whoa. Is that what you meant by freeing?” 

“For some. Everyone’s different. I’m just saying don’t be afraid to show your man some love.”

“We’re really not the …uh, kiss in public type.”

“Then why on earth would you come here?”

“Closed doors. I mean, most places kind of frown on hooking up out in the open.”

“Hooking up?” Erica laughed. “No wonder you’re in the dog house. That’s what makes this place so special. No judgments. Now you’re not going to see the full monty here in public areas, but maybe you should try not being such a stick in the mud. Might get what you want a whole lot sooner.”

Erica gave him a little wave and got up and headed over to the dessert cart. He watched her pick up a plate and then head towards the hall. It wasn’t much to go on, but at least someone was talking to him. He snuck a quick peek at the frisky couple behind him and confirmed that they were still going at it. Maybe it was some type of love spell. He did manage to take something away from his conversation, though. He and Cas needed to do a better job of being a couple if they were going to fit in. 

The library was a small room at the back of the hall behind the stairs, filled with bookshelves and two arm chairs. He wasn’t surprised to find Cas alone in the room. 

“Hey. They’re about to start playing.”

Cas didn’t even look up from the book he was flipping through. 

“Cas.” Dean moved so he was right in front of him. He reached out and covered the pages with his hand. “Come on.”

“I’m not finished.”

“Have you found anything?”

“No, but there is a wide variety from historical retellings to ancient mythology. It’ll take some time to go through these.”

“Well, now’s not the time. We need to go play happy couple before we attract more attention.”

Cas returned the book to the shelf. “I’m not sure that’s the best approach.”

“Trust me. It’s the only approach. We’ve been over this. We’re sticking out like a sore thumb, and we need to come off as a legit couple so we can get these guys talking. There may be some connection between the guests, but we’re not going to find it if we can’t get anyone to talk to us.”

“You could just ask them.”

“Did you forget that Sam already tried that and it didn’t work? People are here for a romantic vacation. If we go out there and start interviewing them, Marjorie is going to toss us out on our asses. She’s already been watching us since we got here.” 

“What would you suggest I do?” Cas huffed.

“Oh, I don’t know. Act like you like me.”

“That’s absurd. I sat with you at dinner just like everyone else sat with their partner. I spoke with you and kept up our cover story.”

“There’s more to it, Cas. Like eye contact. The only time you look directly at me is when you’re glaring at me. Couples look at each other. They touch each other. Everyone here looks more like a couple than we do.”

“That’s because they are, Dean.” Cas was staring at him as if he was crazy.

“So, you’re saying that after everything we’ve done for each other, everything we’ve sacrificed, we can’t even appear to be close?”

A fleeting, pained expression crossed Cas’ features before it was replaced with one of sheer frustration. “It is not in my nature to broadcast my feelings to an audience.”

“Yeah, me neither, but we have to try harder if we’re going to convince them. Look, I know there’s some stuff that we need to hash out, but I promise you can trust me. I’m not going to do anything that you don’t want. All you have to do is give me a little sign, and I’ll back off.” Dean held out his hand and waited for Cas to take it. He let out the breath he’d been holding once he did and led them back to the great room. 

The lights were now dimmed, and the trio was about to start playing. He felt Cas tense up beside him and when he followed his gaze, he saw that Cas had spotted the couple in the back corner. He leaned over and whispered, “Don’t worry. We don’t have to do anything like that.”

Dean motioned for him to go ahead and have a seat and he picked up two mulled ciders and joined him. He handed Cas his drink and settled in next to him, wrapping his arm around his shoulders. The warm cider and rum slid down his throat creating a pleasant burn. The string trio started playing and the combined atmosphere of the music, dimmed lights and spiked cider had Dean feeling relaxed and loose. Once they had finished their drinks, Dean placed the mugs on the side table and wrapped both arms around Cas, pulling him so that he was leaning back against his chest. He brushed a gentle kiss across the top of his head and allowed himself to put the case on the back burner for a while and just focus on the feeling of Cas in his arms. 

 

After the third time Cas dozed off, Dean decided they should call it a night. Nothing eventful was happening, and they could use a good night’s sleep. He figured they’d logged enough couple time so he nudged Cas and nodded towards the door. 

“What are we doing?” Cas whispered once they made it to the hallway. 

“Going to bed, man. You can barely keep your eyes open.”

“Sorry.”

“Stop apologizing. It’s been a long day.”

They didn’t talk as they got ready for bed. Dean wondered if Cas was feeling as nervous as he was about the sleeping arrangements. If so, he wasn’t letting on. Cas came out of the bathroom, stripped down to his underwear and then crawled under the covers. By the time Dean joined him in the bed, Cas was already snoring. It’s for the best, he told himself. Baby steps. 

 

Dean woke up the next morning feeling warm and content. It took him a moment to realize that sometime during the night, Cas had rolled over and curled up next to him. He had to admit that it was a damn nice feeling to have Cas all pressed up against him. Almost too nice. He could feel himself beginning to respond to the warm body draped over his. 

He needed to put some space between them before he did something stupid, but Cas had his leg thrown over his and his head on his shoulder. It felt so good and he was so tempted, but their friendship came first. He started to try to slide out from under Cas only to have the other man tighten his hold and press up closer to him. 

Dean bit his lip and tried to hold back a moan as Cas’ hip brushed across his groin. “Hey, Cas,” he whispered. “I need you to let me up, ok? You can go back to sleep, but I need to get up.”

“Dean. Don’t go. Please.”

He looked over expecting to find Cas still half asleep but instead he found bright blue eyes watching him. In that moment, Dean knew he’d do whatever Cas was asking. He’d rejected him once, and he wasn’t about to do it again. They’d deal with their issues later, but for now, he wanted this. He gave a short nod and waited, giving Cas the reigns. 

It felt like a tidal wave of heat washed over him when Cas touched his erection. All he could think was ‘more’. He wanted to shed his briefs, have Cas on him skin to skin, but he couldn’t get the words out. It was just a hand job with Cas grinding against his hip and sucking bruises into his neck, but it felt like the best sex of his life. He could feel the heat already pooling in the pit of his stomach as his muscles grew taut. He was close, so damn close. 

“Cas,” he croaked, doing his best to suck in air. They were both moaning now, Cas thrusting against his hip and Dean pushing up against his hand, chasing that release that was just beyond reach. So close….

“Fuck!” he shouted, gasping for breath as his eyes flew open. 

Reality came crashing down around him, delivering the harsh message that he had been dreaming, and his body was not pleased with that revelation. He was still on edge, and the urge to come was a strong as ever.

“Fuck,” he muttered again, rubbing a hand through his hair and down across his face. He chanced a glance over at Cas who was still on his side of the bed. 

Dean knew the moment he saw the labored breaths, flushed skin and wide eyes that not only did he just have a sex dream about Cas, but that Cas had just experienced the same thing.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Unbeta'd so all mistakes are mine. Please feel free to let me know of any typos, and I'll gratefully correct them.
> 
> (I don’t own anything related to Supernatural. Just having fun writing stories.)

Dean was no stranger to awkward morning encounters, but this one took the prize. His brain wanted to relive the moment, to savor every touch and sensation, but he needed his head clear. A sex dream, he could handle. Considering where they were and the case, he could even say it was expected but to share one with Cas….

“Cas?” He needed to ask him if he was all right. Did he know what happened? Was he still just as aroused? He would have to wait for his answer. Cas mumbled something and then scrambled from the bed and retreated to the safety of the bathroom. 

Dean was a little too stunned to say anything. The fog was beginning to clear and rational thought was pushing its way through. He worried that Cas wasn’t ok, but Dean decided that he was more likely spooked or embarrassed as opposed to injured in any way. Cas’ quick departure was as effective as a cold shower on his libido, though. 

He sat up and rubbed his hand across his face and tried to think of his next step. Well, at least now he knew that there was definitely a case here. 

He could hear the sound of the water turn on in the bathroom. With Cas busy with a shower, Dean had a few moments to try to get a grasp on what was going on. He tried to think of what had happened and work it like a case, but he kept coming back to that damn dream. His body had finally cooled down, but he couldn’t stop feeling those sensations, the feel of Cas’ lips against his throat, his body pressed against him. 

His phone rang, bringing him out of his thoughts. Of course, Sam would be calling right now.

“Yeah, what?”

“What the hell is your problem?” Sam asked. “I hadn’t heard from you, and I wanted to know if you had anything for me to go on. I’ve got nothing but time to research so hit me up.”

He knew that having another person working the case would move things along faster, but he wasn’t anywhere near ready to talk about their biggest lead.

“Dean?”

“Yeah, I’m here. Nothing’s really happening.”

“Oh.” 

Dean could hear the disappointment and figured that Sam was probably going a bit stir crazy alone in the motel room. “I mean there aren’t any hard leads, nothing over the top. Everyone here is definitely riding the love train. Cas and I are sticking out like sore thumbs, so I’m just going to play it like we’re trying to get over a rough patch.”

“Is that even necessary?”

“Man, you have no idea. I guess that’s something. Everyone is really into this experience. The owner, Marjorie, always seems to be lurking around every corner, making sure we’re all legit.”

“So maybe a sphere of influence that covers the lodge?” Sam suggested. 

“Maybe. I didn’t really feel anything, but Cas says he can feel some type of power build up, but it’s faint.”

“Hmmm, that gives me a few areas to check out. Guess there’s no chance of you guys wrapping this up today.”

“Man, I wish.”

“Well, a winter storm watch has been posted. It’s due to hit later tonight so just a heads up.”

“Got it.” He ended his call and waited for Cas to finish up.

Ten minutes later, Cas emerged from the bathroom with one of the inn’s fluffy pink towels wrapped around his hips. Damn. Dean didn’t think he was ever going to be able to stop thinking about that dream. He turned around to give Cas some privacy and began gathering together his clothes. 

“So, um…” Where the hell did he even start? “You doing ok?”

“I’m fine.”

“Ok, good. Good. So, about earlier…” Dean hedged. He turned around and saw that Cas was already in his shirt and pants. He waited, hoping for some type of reaction so he could see what he was thinking. “Were we dream walking or something?”

“Not at all. I do think we may have been influenced by whatever is going on here, but it was nothing more than a dream.”

He should have been relieved, but Cas’ calm dismissive tone was really starting to grate on him. He had yet to actually look at Dean, instead putting on his socks and shoes and very pointedly looking anywhere but at him. “Yeah, and what makes you so sure?”

Cas finally met his gaze, a challenge in his own eyes. “I am more than familiar with dream manipulation. Besides, you have no physical marks on you. If we had actually been in the dreamscape, there would be physical evidence.”

Well, that was good news, but he was still pissed at Cas, which was all kinds of crazy. Definitely time to move on. He grabbed his stuff and headed into the bathroom. 

 

 

The hot shower helped a little. He tried to recapture the sensations of the dream and release a little tension, but it was too many mixed signals, and his body just wasn’t on board. He exited the bathroom ready to grab some breakfast and hit the reset button. 

“Sam called. He wanted to know more about the power I was sensing. He told me to tell you that he can’t be effective if you withhold information.”

“You told him about the dream,” he sighed.

“Of course. We’re on a case, and he’s trying to help us. Why wouldn’t I tell him?”

Dean could think of a few reasons, none that Cas would understand. “Guess it just slipped my mind.” It was obvious that wasn’t the answer Cas wanted, and Dean could feel the distance between them opening back up. “Look, maybe we should talk about the dream.”

“We already did. I’m ready for breakfast.” Cas stood by the door, his hand already on the doorknob. 

Dean wanted to press the issue but after taking a good look at Cas, he realized that he wasn’t going to get any more out of him. “Fine. Lead the way.”

There was one other couple in the dining room, the frisky couch couple from last night. They exchanged pleasantries before heading to the buffet table. Nothing like a good breakfast to help ease some stress. He loaded up his plate with bacon, french toast, and scrambled eggs before joining Cas at a small table by the window. He couldn’t help but frown when he saw Cas’ selection of fruit and toast. 

“Is that all you’re eating? You feeling ok?”

“I’m fine.”

“I’ll go get you another plate. French toast? Some eggs?”

“Dean, this is all I want. I’m not used to large meals,” he went on as Dean continued to frown at him. 

His own food forgotten, Dean leaned forward a little, even though there wasn’t anyone really close enough to overhear them. “How are you really doing, Cas? I mean, out there on the road. Are you eating enough? Got a regular place to sleep?”

“Dean.”

The one word carried so much, but this one wasn’t on him. He knew that his reaction to Cas’ feelings had sent the other man running, but he never wanted him to stay away. Cas had rebuffed all of their requests to come to the bunker, choosing instead to keep his distance. And he understood. It wasn’t easy being so exposed, but there was no way he was letting this come between them. “Believe it or not, but we’re family. We worry about you.”

“I’m adjusting. It’s…easier this time around.”

“Good morning. I trust you slept well.” Marjorie appeared beside their table with her ever-present, cheerful smile.

Dean tensed and glanced over at Cas who was starting to flush bright red along his neck. “Most comfortable beds ever,” he quipped. 

“Wonderful. And do you have any plans for today?”

Dean shrugged. “We thought we’d just play it by ear.”

“Well, if I might make a few suggestions… we have some wonderful activities, and we would be more than happy to provide the transportation. With the storm coming through tonight, it might make travel a little difficult tomorrow until they get the roads clear so many of our guests are getting out and about while they can.”

“Umm, thanks, but I think we’re just going to take it easy and hang around here,” Dean replied easily while waiting for Marjorie’s reaction. 

“Actually, Dean, I was hoping to get out for a bit if that’s ok.”

Dean glanced over, trying to get a read on what Cas was planning. “Oh ok. Whatever you want, babe.”

“Thank you.”

“Anything specific in mind?” Marjorie asked.

Cas looked at Dean. Apparently he had only made it as far as wanting to get out of the inn, but that was all right. Dean had some ideas. 

“I think we’ll do some sight-seeing and then head over to the rink. How does that sound, babe?”

“I’d like that.”

“And of course, we’ll be happy to drive you. Our shuttle…”

“Oh, thanks, but I like to drive,” Dean interrupted with a winning smile. 

Marjorie looked as if she was about to protest. “Being together in the car, it’s kind of our thing.” And with that seemingly innocent, romantic statement, he won her over. 

 

 

Dean started the car and turned the heater on full blast. He was starting to get used to the cold, but even with his new jacket, Cas still appeared miserable. They had stopped at one of the tourist shops and picked up a nice jacket as well as a cap and gloves for Cas. That was one of the perks of being in an area that celebrated outdoor winter activities, almost every shop carried winter wear. The downside was that one had to be outdoors to enjoy the activities, and no matter how much he bundled Cas up, the poor guy was still always cold. 

Cas sat hunched in on himself in the passenger seat, scowling hard enough that Dean was sure he was going to give himself a headache. 

“Dean.”

“Yeah?”

“Why did you suggest ice skating if you don’t know how to skate?”

He shrugged, beginning to wonder the same thing himself. “You said you wanted to get out and do something today. Out of all the activities the inn promotes, ice skating seemed the most appealing. I, uh, thought we could learn together. Thought it might be something fun, something not work-related.” 

Cas’ lips twitched in the slightest of smiles. “I think I could appreciate the sentiment more if I wasn’t so sore. How can falling on ice hurt more than being thrown around by a monster?”

Not wanting to break the easy truce that seemed to be budding, Dean decided to ignore the monster comment. They had both taken quite a few spills, but Dean had started getting the hang of it and could make it around the rink without incident. Cas hadn’t fared so well. “Sam would never let us live it down if we’d broken anything. Glad we didn’t press our luck skiing,” he mused. “Why couldn’t this case have happened at a small bed and breakfast in South Florida? Sun and bikinis.”

“I imagine my presence would put a damper on your pursuit of bikinis,” Cas pointed out. 

“Oh, I don’t know.” Dean gave him a cheeky grin. “I think you’d look pretty hot in a bikini.” It was remarkably easy to get Cas to blush, and Dean was glad to see that Cas was taking the teasing in stride, despite his embarrassment. 

“Hey Cas?”

“Hmmm?”

“Why did you want to get out today? I would have thought you’d want to check out the inn some more.” 

“Yes, that still needs to be done, but I wanted to see if I could feel the energy away from there.”

“Could you?”

Cas shook his head. 

“So, it’s localized. Did you feel that power build up this morning after the dream?”

Cas hesitated a moment before nodding his head. “It was stronger this morning.”

“Seriously? And you didn’t think I needed to know this?” Dean felt his frustration starting to stir at the thought of Cas withholding information. 

“You experienced the dream. I didn’t see the need to discuss it anymore. I passed the information along to Sam. What should I have done?”

“I want you to talk to me. Yeah, I know the basics - the dream happened. We both experienced it. But the fact that we can’t even talk about it has me worried.”

“Fine. What would you like to know?”

“Have you ever had a dream like that before?”

“No.”

“Never?” Dean wasn’t sure what to do with that piece of information. He could understand it not happening when he was an angel, but he’d been human for a good six months now. 

“No,” he repeated, a hint of red returning to his face. 

“Ok, so no dream. Have you ever done anything like that before, maybe a memory?”

Cas’ expression had gone from uncomfortably defensive to downright mortified. “No! I don’t see how this is relevant.”

Dean studied him for a moment. Yeah, the dream was strange on so many levels, but Cas’ reaction seemed a bit off as well. He was usually the logical one, the one who didn’t care how awkward a situation could get. “It’s relevant because it helps us try to determine the source. Why this particular dream? Where did it come from, and what’s the end goal? It’s our biggest clue, and you want to sweep it under the rug. What gives?”

“It’s humiliating,” Cas finally admitted. 

“Hey, Buddy. I was there with you. I get it. Been caught with my pants down before, though; it’s not that big of a deal.”

“It’s not the same,” he said with a shake of his head. “I was the one begging and ….”

Dean drummed his fingers against the steering wheel and thought about the fact that even though Cas was ancient, he was still a baby in terms of experiencing humanity. “Listen, man, this case might be a little more than we expected. Nobody really likes to have their most private thoughts exposed, but good sex is supposed to make you fall apart. In a good way. No shame in that.”

Cas still wasn’t looking at him, but he did nod. “Can we head back now?”

Well, at least they talked about it. Sort of. “Yeah, sure.”

 

 

“How are you not sore?” Cas grumbled as they made their way back into their room.

Although he sympathized with him, Dean couldn’t help but be a little amused as he watched Cas limp towards the bed. “It’s cause you don’t know how to fall,” he told him. “When you’re going down, you just have to go with it. You fought it and that makes you hit harder.”

Cas shot him a look. “That makes no sense.”

“You’re over thinking it. Think you sprained anything?”

“I don’t think so.”

“I’ll check you over, but it’s probably just bruises and sore muscles. A hot bath will help.” Dean went into the bathroom and began filling the tub. “Go ahead and hop in. I’m going to run down to the car and grab the first aid kit and get you some painkillers and some cream for the bruising.”

He waited a second until Cas got up and started moving towards the bathroom before heading downstairs. He grabbed the small first aid kit and was heading back down the hall when he heard someone call his name. He took a few steps back and looked into the dining room. 

“Hey Erica. I thought you and um, Dane, were going to be hitting the slopes today.”

“We did. We did a few runs this morning and now we’re getting ready to head out for an early dinner before the storm hits. What about you? I came back down for more dessert last night and saw you and your guy looking all cozy. I guess things are going well?”

Dean hesitated for a moment. He wanted to play up their cover and come off as the happy couple, but it may work better for them if he kept people believing they were still working out their issues. “We’re getting there. Baby steps.”

“Do anything special? Take that leap?”

“Actually, yeah. We went ice skating.”

“Really?” she smiled. “How’d that go?”

“Not very well,” he chuckled. “Cas took quite a few hits, and he’s pretty banged up.”

“Poor thing. Guess you’ll get a chance to spend some time pampering him.”

“Yeah. Guess so.”

“Go get him, Tiger.” 

“Hey, can I ask you something? During all your visits here, have you ever noticed anything strange?”

Erica gave him a look. “What do you mean? Strange how?”

“I don’t know. We had some strange dreams last night, and I was just curious,” he said with a shrug and sheepish grin. 

“Strange? Oh, that kind of dream. Nope, can’t say that I have.”

“Ok. Just checking. Guess I should get back up there. Have fun at dinner.” He started walking away only to stop when Erica called out to him. “Yeah?”

“It’s been my experience that when you have those types of dreams, it’s because the body is craving something.”

Dean ignored the suggestive smirk and tried to think of what that could possibly mean for them. He gave her a nod and headed down the hall towards the stairs. There was definitely something here, but he really didn’t have anything else to go on than what he’d had earlier. 

“Cas?” The room was empty when he got back. He placed the first aid kit on the dresser and walked over to the bathroom door. He rapped on the door. “Cas?” He waited a moment before trying again. “Cas, I’m coming in.” He nudged the door open and poked his head through the doorway. He could feel the heat from the steam surrounding the room but still no reply from Cas. He could see him in the tub, his head resting on the side ledge. 

“Hey man, you doing ok?” He hung back a little to give Cas some privacy, but he was starting to get a little worried. He moved forward and knelt beside the tub. His face was flushed and his eyes were closed and so far, he hadn’t given any indication that he was aware that Dean was in the room. “Cas?”

Cas’ eyes opened into tiny slits before sliding closed again. “Dean,” he murmured, his voice soft and raspy. 

“You feeling ok? Talk to me?” He reached out and pressed a hand to his forehead, frowning as he felt the hot and clammy skin. He dipped his hand into the water. It was hot but not overly so. Still Cas was definitely hotter than normal. “It’s too muggy in here. Let’s get you out of the tub and into the other room. That should cool you down.”

He held onto his arm and tried to get him up, but Cas was like dead weight. It took several attempts before he could get him to his feet and even then, he was leaning heavily on him. They shuffled their way across the room where Dean finally got him lying down on the bed. He ran back into the bathroom and grabbed a towel that he placed across his midsection. Granted, by now he had seen it all, but he thought Cas would appreciate the privacy. 

“Feel better?” He checked his temperature and was relieved that Cas felt a little cooler.

“Yes. Thank you.”

“It’s all right. Just a little too warm in there.”

Cas frowned and shook his head. “I don’t think so. Right before I started feeling warm, I felt that energy. It was stronger this time.”

Dan studied him, listening to what he was saying but also checking him over to make sure he was really all right. The only things he could see were the red marks from where he had fallen. Cas would be sporting some spectacular bruises in the next few days. Now that the crisis was over, Dean was starting to take notice of their situation. Cas was still damp from the bath, lying on the bed with only a towel for cover. 

“I got the cream for the sore muscles. It’s Sam’s herbal crap and smells girly as shit, but he swears by it. You should put some on and rest up. I’ll go check around and see if I can find anything.”

Cas turned and propped himself up on his arm, causing the towel to shift and slide forward a bit. “Dean, I’ll be fine in a minute. I can go with you.”

Dean tore his eyes away from the curve of Cas’ hipbone only to find himself staring at his chest. “Nah, you rest up. I’ll come get you if I find anything.”

“Dean….”

“Rest, Cas,” he told him without so much as a backwards glance. He needed a breather to get himself sorted out. This entire case was throwing him off, and his feelings for Cas were only muddying the waters. It would be so easy to blame their surroundings and some type of romantic influence, but he’d been feeling this way for quite some time now. Once he had gotten past his own guilt and hurt feelings, he actually started entertaining the idea of what if. But this situation made it hard for him to get a read on what was really happening. Was this really their chemistry when they weren’t fighting apocalyptic battles or was it the case? Did Cas really not want to be close to him or was he still sore about Dean rejecting him? Too many questions and nowhere near enough answers. 

 

It was surprisingly easy to wander around the inn without his significant other. He ran into a few people and was able to make polite conversation. Everyone thought it was so adorable that Cas was upstairs taking a nap after a romantic morning of ice skating, and Dean played it up for all it was worth. He even managed to get another couple talking about their stay and whether they had experienced anything strange. The overall consensus, though, seemed to be that nobody was experiencing anything out of the ordinary. And if hadn’t been for that dream and Cas feeling the energy, he would be inclined to think this was nothing other than people getting caught up in the moment. 

He decided to take a quick walk around outside and call Sam before heading back to his room. It wasn’t avoidance; he wasn’t finding anything so Cas might as well stay in and rest. 

“Hey.” Sam picked up on the first ring. “Got anything?”

“Do you?” Dean countered, hopeful for a speedy resolution. 

“Nothing concrete. While your leads were something, there still isn’t much to go on. I tried to track down some former guests. It was kind of hard since the innkeepers won’t talk to anyone, but I managed to find some through a review site. So far no one has been killed or injured so whatever this is, it’s not doing serious harm. One couple felt that the inn helped them to lower their inhibitions and their sex life has never been better. Another lady said that during her stay with her boyfriend, she felt compelled to confront him about where their relationship was going and if he loved her enough to marry him. All of this seems too tame for a trickster or cupid.”

“Yeah. What about witches?” Dean asked.

“I guess it’s possible someone could be casting love spells, but why? A hopeless romantic that wants to give couples a nudge? I mean, not all of them are having a happily romantic ever after. Some are but some are fighting, like Charlie’s friends. Have you seen anything?”

“No. Cas said he felt some energy this morning when we woke up. We went into town, and he couldn’t sense anything. When we got back here, he took a hot bath but got overheated. I thought it was from the bath but he said that he felt that energy spike right before he started getting hot.”

“Is he ok?” 

“I think so,” Dean replied, even though his gut was telling him otherwise. It wasn’t anything specific, just an unsettled feeling. 

“All right. So it’s confined to the inn, it’s not life-threatening, there’s an energy spike and dream manipulation. I’ll see what I can find. Keep me up to date on how Cas is doing,” Sam told him before signing off. 

It was getting dark and the temperature was dropping, but Dean finished his walk around the grounds. He wasn’t surprised that he didn’t find anything. Whatever was here was very well hidden. 

When he returned to the room, Cas was up and dressed and ready to head down for dinner. Something was off, though. 

“Dude, you don’t look so good. Did you rest at all?”

“Yes,” Cas huffed. “I’m fine. Did you find anything?”

Dean wasn’t sure what he did to warrant this attitude, but he pushed it aside and told Cas about his phone call with Sam. 

“It could be a cupid,” Cas mused, “but he would most likely be operating on his own as there doesn’t seem to be any reason to his actions.” 

“Guess we’ll have to wait for him to make another move. Hey, how about ordering dinner up to the room? We could kick back and try to make some sense of all this.” Dean was convinced that something was going on with Cas, and the direct approach apparently wasn’t working. His skin was flushed, and he seemed uncomfortable and fidgety. He strongly suspected Cas was having another hot flash. 

Cas gave him a curious glance. “We won’t find out anything if we stay up here. The answers are in this building. We just need to find them.”

Remembering the couple that had spent their vacation arguing, Dean resisted the urge to argue his point. “Ok, dinner downstairs.” He held out his hand, daring Cas not to take it. After a moment, Cas reached out and clasped his hand with Dean’s, confirming Dean’s suspicion. 

And if Dean hadn’t already known, the amount of ice water that Cas downed during dinner was a sure give away. He still wasn’t eating enough, and nothing Dean said would convince him to eat more. 

With the impending storm, the inn hadn’t scheduled any evening activities so many of the couples were keeping to themselves. Cas wanted to check out the library some more so Dean joined him with a couple of after-dinner drinks. 

“I got you a hot apple toddy,” he told him as he placed it on the coaster on the antique side table. He looked up just in time to see Cas grimace even though he’d had no problem with them the night before. “Cas, are you being straight with me? You really aren’t looking so good, man.” He moved closer only for Cas to take a step back. Dean raised an eyebrow, silently asking, what the hell?

“It’s nothing. I think I might be on to something with these books,” he started only for Dean to cut him off. 

“Cas,” he hissed. “What the hell is going on? Are you feeling hot again?” There weren’t really any outside signs other than Cas looking a little red. He wasn’t sweating, but he had been picking at his henley all during dinner. And now he was starting to breathe a little faster. Dean was really starting to get worried. “Cas?”

“I just need a minute.” He left the library without another word. 

Dean couldn’t believe he just walked out. What the hell could be so bad that he couldn’t tell him? Whatever the hell was here was definitely affecting Cas, both physically and emotionally. He followed him out the front door and down towards the pond. “Hey!” He caught his arm and yanked him back towards him. “Stop. Damn, it’s cold out here.”

Cas wasn’t pulling away from him, but he wasn’t engaging either. He did seem calmer, though. 

“You have to talk to me.”

His eyes flicked over to him before drifting away again. 

Dean let his hand drift down his arm until he could grasp his hand. He took a step closer and gently placed his free hand on Cas’ cheek. “Please.”

Cas sighed and leaned a little into the space between them. “Yes. The energy and the heat. I felt them both before you came back to the room. It’s… uncomfortable but bearable. It’s….”

“What?” Dean prompted. He moved his hand from his cheek to the back of Cas’ neck, massaging and encouraging him. 

Cas let out a soft keening sound. “It’s better when you’re near. I can think. The fog clears.”

“So this helps?” he asked, mindful that Cas seemed embarrassed by that admission. When he received another nod in confirmation, he didn’t think twice about closing the little distance between them. He pulled him into his arms and held him close, cheek to cheek, chest to chest, hip to hip. Cas made the softest of whimpers, and Dean was hard pressed not to cry out as well. Cas felt so good, and he could only imagine the relief that Cas must be feeling after hours of running hot. He wondered why Cas was so damn stubborn and didn’t just tell him. He shivered and tried to burrow closer. Cas seemed comfortable now, but he was freezing. 

“No.” Cas began pushing him away. “We can’t do this.”

“Stop.” Dean tightened his hold. “If this helps, then we’ll stay like this for a while.”

“No. It’s not real. Something is affecting us. We can’t give in to it.”

Dean leaned back just enough so he could look at Cas. “The hell are you talking about? Nothing is affecting me, and if the solution to your discomfort is being near me, then that was obviously the goal of whatever’s happening to you. It’s not going to make it worse.”

“Dean. Let go.” Cas tried pushing against him again. “You said you wouldn’t do anything I didn’t want. I don’t want this.”

Stung, Dean dropped his arms and gave Cas his space. He was so hurt that he could barely form the words. “Do you resent me that much?”

Cas’ expression immediately changed from annoyed to stunned. “Of course not. How could you even ask me that?” he whispered. 

Dean closed his eyes for a couple of seconds and took a deep breath. It didn’t help. The sharp pang of rejection was still burning through him. “You gave up your grace for me. You gave up being an angel for me, and now you won’t even let me do something as simple as hold you when it clearly helps. What else am I supposed to think?”

“That maybe holding me is anything but simple.”


	4. Chapter 4

Cas’ quiet admission hung in the air between them. Dean was so far out of his depth at this point. He knew that he bore quite a bit of the responsibility for the fractured relationship. His rejection had obviously cut deep, but he hadn’t realized it had affected Cas this much. 

“So how do we fix this?”

“I don’t know,” Cas replied. 

“Well, we need to figure it out because all this stuff between us is not an option.” Dean gestured to Cas and then back to himself. He tucked his arms around himself and shifted a bit to try to shake off the cold. “Look, I know that I hurt you, and I’m sorry. And as lame as it may sound, it’s me. Not you. I was in a bad space then, but it was never my intention to push you away.”

“Dean. Now’s not the time. We have a case.”

He understood the wall Cas had put up but that didn’t mean he liked being shut out. Cas wasn’t even giving him a chance to try to fix this. “Actually, we don’t. Not like this.”

“What are you talking about?”

“This case is as good as dead because what’s going on between us is too big. You know, I used to be able to do this. The job always came first, but we’re just spinning our wheels here. Feelings only make things messy, but I can’t let this go. So, if you and I can’t figure this out, let’s just pack it in and call another hunter who doesn’t have our baggage.”

Cas watched him for a moment, indecision all over his face before he finally nodded. “There’s no need to call anyone in.”

“Good. Now, can we please go back inside before I start losing limbs?” He waited just long enough to make sure Cas was following him before he turned and headed back towards the inn. He stopped at the front door and took Cas’ hand as they made their way inside. He didn’t let go until they reached their room. 

“You doing ok?”

“No. Not really,” Cas told him. “So, what happens next?”

“We figure this out.” He was starting to warm up now that he was back indoors. He took a seat on the side of the bed and wondered how they should even begin. This was all new to him. He had never tried to define his feelings for Cas; he just accepted that he cared about him. But now, there was a demand to define what they were. Ever since their shared dream, he’d been thinking of doing things with Cas that he’d never even considered before, and he was surprisingly ok with that.

“So, talk to me, man. Tell me what’s going on in your mind.”

“I think the key is in the library. I haven’t had a chance to go through all the books, but I’m starting to notice patterns. I need some more time, though,” Cas began. 

“Ok. But first things first. What about us? You know, there used to be a time when you would talk to me.”

Cas took a seat on the bed next to Dean. He took a minute, as he seemed to be searching for the right words. “You are very important to me. You always have been, and I don’t believe that will ever change. I don’t know how to give you the answers you want. I’m not sure I know myself.”

Dean reached over and took hold of his hand and threaded their fingers together. He was doing that a lot lately, but he enjoyed the close contact, the skin on skin connection. “When I found out how you felt, I was in bad shape. You know all the things I did. And then you gave up your grace. It was too much. Look, I know I’m the one who pushed you away, and I’m sorry.”

“Thank you but your apology is unnecessary. It was unfair to burden you with that knowledge.”

“So, you think we can get past this?” He leaned a bit, bumping his side against him. 

“Of course. It’s just, this place is proving difficult. My thoughts and feelings are being affected, and I cannot concentrate. Whatever is here seems to be targeting us.”

“Targeting you,” Dean corrected. 

“You don’t think you’re suffering from anything or being influenced by whatever’s here?” Cas gave him a skeptical look. “I know you, Dean. Being openly affectionate towards me is not your usual demeanor. ”

“This isn’t our usual situation, but no, nothing’s influencing me.” He had a feeling that Cas didn’t believe him, though. “The case requires us to be close, but it’s not like we’re strangers, either.” Cas shifted a little and tried to pull his hand free, but Dean tightened his grip. “Don’t. This is helping, right?”

“Not as much as before,” he admitted. 

“What are you feeling now?” He ran his eyes over him. He was starting to figure out the signs, and Cas was looking flushed again as well as tired. 

“The same as earlier. The energy feeling is like a constant, dull buzzing now, and I’m hot. Proximity doesn’t appear to be a factor anymore. I think I’m getting close to something, but I just can’t make the connection.”

“Something like what?”

“I don’t know. It’s … fuzzy. I can focus on other things, but when I try to think about the case, I can’t.”

“And being close to me doesn’t help anymore?” He’d been sitting next to Cas and holding his hand for a while now. Whatever was affecting Cas was getting more intense. 

“A little. Somewhat.”

Testing out a theory, Dean scooted back and moved over behind Cas, pulling him back against his chest and resting his chin on his shoulder. He immediately loosened his grip when Cas flinched. “What’s wrong? Is this not ok?” 

“Sorry,” Cas muttered, “I didn’t mean….”

“It’s ok.” Dean slowly wrapped his arms back around him as Cas eased back against him. He was still tense, but Dean could feel him beginning to loosen up a tad. “Better?”

“Much.”

Dean leaned forward, letting his chin rest on his shoulder again. He was doing this for Cas, but he couldn’t deny how wonderful it felt. Minutes passed and Dean began to hope that Cas might be coming around. He turned his head and nuzzled his neck, breathing in Cas’ unique scent. Even though he was human now, he still reminded Dean of a spring thunderstorm. 

Cas gave a contented murmur but otherwise made no effort to move or speak. 

“Guess this is really working,” Dean mused. 

“Umm, it is. I’m starting to feel normal, but I’m tired. The heat is very draining.”

“Did you rest at all this afternoon?”

“Couldn’t. Too uncomfortable.”

Dean wondered about the motive behind Cas needing constant touch from him. Was it supposed to get them to engage in a physical relationship or was it just a distraction to keep Cas off his game? If they didn’t get a break soon, he was considering taking Cas over to the motel with Sam. “Think you can tell me what you’ve got so far and then you can catch some shut-eye?”

Cas shifted a bit and tried to sit forward, but Dean gave him a little squeeze indicating he should stay put.

“The library is filled with books, love stories. There is one section on ancient Greece, and when I started going through it, I got an image. Wings,” Cas trailed off, frustration coloring his voice. 

“Wings. Like in a cupid?” Dean asked. 

“Maybe. It’s hazy, but it doesn’t feel right. It’s familiar but not angelic.”

Dean ran through his mental encyclopedia of the supernatural and tried to come up with a match. Cas was right. This didn’t feel angelic, but with the hit and miss targeting, nothing else was matching either. “You said that you thought it would be worse to allow me to be near you. Maybe that was the point?”

“To what end?”

“I don’t know,” Dean shrugged. “From what Sam’s been telling me, everything has been specific per couple, but not always bad. Whatever was influencing them seemed to be pushing them towards something, focusing on some aspect of their relationship. First there was the dream, and now you’re getting hot flashes that are only getting better the closer we are.”

“Ok?”

“Maybe instead of fighting this, you should give in to it. Those aren’t exactly subtle hints.”

Cas pulled out of Dean’s arms despite Dean’s attempts to hold onto him. Standing across from him, Cas stared at him with such intensity that Dean wondered if he was pushing Cas too far, even though he thought it was their best course of action at this point. 

“What exactly are you suggesting?”

What was he suggesting? “Look, all I’m saying is that being physical helps you for some reason. So, if we need to be a little more hands on with each other, I’m ok with that.” 

“We don’t even know how far or what’s involved and you think we should just go along with whatever’s happening here?” Cas’ eyes grew wide before narrowing to study Dean. 

“It’s not like we’ve got any better ideas. It appears to target random couples, and we hit the lottery when it chose you. From what Erica has told me, this is nothing more than just a romantic vacation for most people.”

“Erica?” 

“Yeah. She’s one of the guests. She and her guy come up her pretty regularly, and she’s never noticed anything unusual.” He wished Cas would come back and sit with him, but that deer-in-headlights expression told him that Cas still had some reservations. 

“I’ve never met her.”

Dean thought about it for a second. “Huh, I guess not. Anyway, nothing’s pinging on her radar, and besides the couple that was going at it hot and heavy, everyone seems pretty much unaffected. You’re our biggest lead.”

He could see it, that moment when Cas made his decision, when doubt took a backseat to determination. “So we go along with whatever’s influencing us.” He made the statement as if saying it once more gave him the strength to carry through. “We should head back to the library.”

“In the morning. You look dead on your feet. Get some sleep, and I’ll see if I can’t find any leads.”

“Are you leaving?”

Dean saw a flash of concern and remembered that Cas had been miserable during their afternoon apart as well as probably still sore from their afternoon of skating. “No, I can set up here. If you lie down next to me, that should keep you from overheating.”

“We shouldn’t waste any more time. I’m sure I’ll be fine,” Cas hedged.

Dean gave him a pointed look. Did they not just have this conversation? “Get some rest. We’ll get Sam up to speed, and we might be able to narrow down what we’re looking for. You’ll be recharged and back in the game. We might even be able to wrap this up.” 

He didn’t give him a chance to protest. He got up and gathered the painkillers and muscle cream and set them on the nightstand on Cas’ side of the bed. He then retrieved his bag from under the bed and pulled out the laptop and several books. He stacked the books on his nightstand and booted up the computer. Pulling back the covers, he gave Cas another pointed look towards his side of the bed. “Fine, if it bothers you that much, you can help until you fall asleep.” 

Cas didn’t reply, but he did take the pills. Dean hid his grin when he saw Cas wrinkle his nose at the muscle cream. He settled in on his side of the bed with the laptop on his lap. It wasn’t long before Cas kicked off his shoes and joined him. 

“Winged creatures of love?” Cas read off the screen. 

“Hey, gotta start somewhere. Hey, before you nod off, think you can shoot Sam a text and let him know what’s going on?”

“Of course.” 

Once his task was completed, Cas moved hesitantly over to Dean. “Is this all right?”

Dean glanced over even though he was well aware of the distance between them. As far as he was concerned, Cas really couldn’t get too close, but they were still baby-stepping their way through this. “Yeah, you’re good. You might want to scooch in a bit, though, just so you can see the screen.” 

It didn’t take long for Dean to hear the soft little snores. He laid his hand on his forehead. Cas wasn’t as hot as he’d been earlier, but he was still a little warm. It had been a long day, and the sound of the ice hitting the windows was making the idea of a nap sound extremely appealing. He put the laptop to sleep and then placed it on the nightstand. He switched off his lamp, and then slid closer to Cas who shifted and curled into Dean. It had been a damn long time since he’d slept snuggled up next to someone, and this was necessary for Cas’ well being. No reason to think any deeper than that. With the warm body pressed up against him, he told himself that he just needed four hours, and he’d be good to go. 

 

All too soon, it seemed he was opening his eyes and trying to determine what had woken him. The storm was supposed to last until mid morning but everything was quiet. He looked at his watch but the numbers wouldn’t focus. Instinct had him sitting up and scanning the room. Cas was gone. He jumped out of bed and immediately reached for his bag and gun, but they were also gone. He dropped to his knees and peered under the bed.

“Dean.”

He jumped up, relieved. “Cas?” He glanced down at himself and then back at Cas. “The hell are you doing in a dress?” Something was definitely off. Cas looked ten shades of pissed off but coupled with his messy hair and bare legs, it was coming off more as strangely enticing.

“It’s a smock,” he growled. 

Yep, definitely pissed off. He glanced at the clock on the nightstand and once again couldn’t focus. “It’s a dream. We’re just dreaming again,” he repeated, growing stronger in that conviction as he looked at Cas. 

“We are,” Cas confirmed, his scowl still firmly in place. “But this time, we’re actually in the dreamscape.”


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Unbeta'd so all mistakes are mine. Please feel free to let me know of any typos, and I'll gratefully correct them.
> 
> (I don’t own anything related to Supernatural. Just having fun writing stories.)

“We’re actually in the dream? What? How?” Dean asked, looking around for some type of confirmation. 

“Whatever’s been affecting us must have brought us here.”

“No, I mean how do you know we’re actually in the dream instead of just sharing a dream?”

“Because I can tell.”

“Yeah, I’m going to need a little more.” His gut told him that this was really Cas in front of him, but he needed to be sure.

Cas gave him a smite-worthy glare before gesturing towards the room. “None of our stuff is here. Your books, computer, the medicine. It’s all gone. I can’t hear anything, and I bet if you looked out the window, you wouldn’t see anything, just like we’re unable to read the time on the clock.”

“Ok, so it’s a dream, but how do you know we’re not just dreaming that we’re standing here talking?“ 

Cas actually growled as he lifted his dress, no smock, and pointed to his hip. “The bruises. You didn’t have any marks when you woke up this morning, but I still have mine from skating earlier.”

Dean could see the purplish bruise along with quite a bit more. “So you give me grief all day about being too close to me, and now you just flash me your junk like it’s no big deal.”

“You saw it when you got me out of the bath earlier. You need to understand that we’re really here, weaponless. You have to trust that I know what I’m talking about.”

“I do.” And the lack of weapons thing was gnawing at him as well. “So, what the hell is your subconscious trying to tell us?”

“Why do you assume this is based on me?”

“Because I’m in my regular clothes, and you’re in a short dress and,” he walked around the bed and looked Cas over from head to toe, “barefoot. I can be a kinky son of a bitch, but I’ve never pictured you in a dress.”

Cas flushed bright red, and Dean was sure that Cas wouldn’t last much longer without throttling someone. 

“The smock is irrelevant,” Cas snapped as he began searching the room. “There doesn’t appear to be anything we can use as a weapon.”

“What about you?”

“What about me? I can still fight.”

“No, I mean, your powers. Since it’s a dream and most likely influenced by you, think you can conjure up any of your old powers?”

Cas frowned and then shook his head. “I can do spells, the stronger ones will require blood, though.”

Dean knew before he felt his pockets that he wouldn’t find his knife. “Damn. All right, then. We stick together and hope this is just some sort of short message.” He motioned towards the room door. “After you.” 

Cas took hold of his hand, and it didn’t escape Dean that it was only during the dreams that Cas initiated close contact. 

“Dreamscapes can be very confusing,” Cas explained. “It would be best if we stayed together.”

Dean gave his hand a squeeze in acknowledgment. They stepped through the doorway and ended up in the front foyer, as if they had just come through the front door. “Ok,” Dean drawled, looking around. “At least, it’s familiar.” With his hand still entwined with Cas’, they walked into the main room.

Dean saw the trio from the other night and realized that they were watching a reenactment. “Ok, so are we watching a memory?” He saw himself and Cas sitting on the sofa, cuddled up close to each other, exactly as they had been that evening. He then looked over at the other couples and realized that there were some glaring differences. 

“Uh Cas? I’m pretty sure that wasn’t happening. No way we missed that going on behind us.” The frisky couple had gone from aggressively making out to straight up sex on the love seat in the back corner of the room. 

Cas didn’t say anything, but tugged on Dean’s hand as he started backing out of the room. They walked across the hall and came upon a similar scene in the dining room. Another couple that they had seen off and on during their stay was naked and splayed out on one of the tables. 

“Cas? Are you sure there isn’t something going on that you want to tell me about?” Dean knew what he was seeing, but he had a feeling that this had more to do with Cas than the actual romantic effects of the inn. Romantic gestures- he had seen over the past few days in whispered conversations and light touches, but these couples were rounding third and literally sliding into home. 

Again, Cas didn’t say anything but instead moved closer towards the table and the writhing couple.

“Dude. Not cool.” Dean didn’t let go of his hand, but held his ground, refusing to move any closer. 

Cas nodded towards the table. “I don’t remember this being served.”

Understatement, Dean thought before he focused on the bread, wine and olives. “Ok, yeah, so we had better food. Considering what’s being served up next to it, I think you’re kind of missing the point.”

Cas shot him a look before his eyes seemed to focus on something behind Dean. Twisting his head around, Dean saw Marjorie turn and slip out of the room. 

“Come on.” He squeezed Cas’ hand and set out after their innkeeper. The hallway was empty, and they continued towards the back hall, coming to the entrance to the library. He stopped short and heard Cas make a small noise, but he couldn’t look at him. He should have been prepared, considering what they had just seen, but he really wasn’t. And he knew for a fact that he and Cas had never, not once, done the things that their dream twins were currently doing on the small armchair in the corner of the room. Dean couldn’t tear his eyes away from the image of himself sitting in the chair, his shirt still on and pants down around his ankles with Cas naked from the waist down and on his lap. He watched as dream Cas moved on him lost in pleasure while his dream counterpart guided Cas’ movements with his hands gripping his ass cheeks. 

“We really need to talk,” Dean muttered. He chanced a glance over to Cas only to find him transfixed in a way he hadn’t been in the other rooms. His eyes were looking in the direction of the couple on the chair, but they had a glazed look to them. Dean could hear that he was breathing a little deeper, a little noisier than before, and his hand had become slack in his. Dean tightened his grip, remembering Cas’ earlier warning. 

“Hey, we’re in the library. Maybe we can pick up on what you were missing.” He gave Cas’ arm a little shake to gain his attention. 

Cas slowly looked towards him and then nodded. Relieved that Cas seemed to be back with him, he started looking for anything else that might be out of place. He noticed a painting on the wall above one of the smaller bookshelves. He hadn’t take much stock of the decor beyond looking for clues, but he was one hundred percent positive that painting wasn’t in the actual library. It would have stood out as it did now. The room was decorated in a country floral style, and a painting of the Acropolis didn’t quite match. 

“Ok, so the two of us going at it like porn stars and this painting. Anything else pinging on your radar?” Unfortunately, Cas wasn’t answering as the glazed, pinched look was back on his face while he stared at the painting. Before Dean could say or do anything, the painting changed to an image of Cas strapped to a chair with Metatron standing over him. 

“The hell? Hey! Ow! Ease up on the grip.” Dean was tempted to pull his hand away until he looked back up at Cas’ face. It wasn’t often that he saw Cas unnerved, but he looked downright freaked right now. He glanced back to the painting and saw that it was now an image of the night sky filled with balls of light. The angels falling. Whatever was controlling this dreamscape really had their hooks in Cas’ brain. 

He moved to stand in front of him and block his view of the wall. He reached down and took hold of his free hand as well. “It’s not happening. You’re right here with me. Come on, focus on me.” He wasn’t responding, and Dean was starting to get worried. He tried to push him from the room, but he was an immovable weight. He glanced around, looking for anything, any clue that would help him right now. He obviously wasn’t in control here, but he needed to find some way to get through to Cas. Dean watched as his eyes began to water and knew that he was reliving those moments on the painting. They were close. Whatever the hell was going on here was spilling out from Cas’ mind, and this force was doing everything to block it. 

Following an impulse, Dean wrapped an arm around his waist and pulled their bodies flush. The kiss was soft, gentle, and coaxing. A plea for Cas to return to him. Discouragement threatened to take over as he continued to caress unresponsive lips. “Please,” he whispered, trying again. 

Cas let out a small whimper and parted his lips. Dean took that opportunity with everything he had. He hated that their first kiss was under these circumstances, but he wasn’t about to lose Cas. He gave his bottom lip a little nip and then used his tongue to soothe the area, relieved to hear Cas make a little hitching noise and open his mouth the tiniest bit more. Dean took full advantage, tasting and teasing. He could feel Cas responding to him, yielding to his touch. Reluctantly, he pulled back just enough to look at him. His eyes were closed, but they slowly opened to meet Dean’s questioning gaze. 

“Are you back with me?” He thought he knew the answer. He hoped, but he had to be sure. 

Cas nodded and swayed slightly towards him as if he wanted to resume their recent activity. It was then that they both seemed to become aware of how aroused Cas was and how the smock did very little to hide that fact. Cas hissed and jumped back, trying to pull out of Dean’s grasp, but Dean refused to let go, going as far as to step back into his space. 

“Dean. I’m so, so sorry.” Cas sputtered out his apology with wide eyes and flushed cheeks. 

“Hey, calm down. It’s ok.” Truthfully, he was more than a little aroused himself, but the heavy denim of his jeans did a better job of hiding it than the thin cotton of the tunic. He could feel the heat returning and could see that that the red flush to his skin wasn’t just embarrassment. “What do you need?”

Cas shook his head. “No. I won’t take…this isn’t real.”

“You’re right. None of this is real, but we are, and it’s affecting you. I almost lost you a few minutes ago, so we need to figure out how to keep that from happening again.” 

“We should leave this room.” Cas was staring at the couple on the chair again. 

“No. I think this room is the key. You were doing ok until we came in here, and now you’re spacing out. You’re hot again. We just need to try to focus.” Dean could see that Cas’ attention was starting to drift. Their dream counterparts were becoming more enthusiastic, and honestly, Dean was pretty tempted to watch them as well, but the real Cas needed him much more. 

“Come here.” He tried to draw Cas back to him. “Just a hug,” he promised. He maneuvered himself in an attempt to limit Cas’ view of the room. Cas flinched away again once they made contact, and Dean wrapped his arms around him. Cas shuddered as he sank into the embrace, and Dean could sympathize. The guy was hard as steel and the friction from the fabric and the press of their bodies had to be just this side of frustrating. He swayed a little, hoping to give him a little relief without crossing too many lines. 

“Dean,” he choked, sucking in a deep breath.

“Easy, man. We’re just standing here. We’ll figure this out. Is this helping?” he asked. 

“A little, but-”

“Then just go with it. We talked about this, remember?”

“Dean, we never discussed how far.”

“I’m ok with this, man. I’d rather be somewhere else doing this, of course, but we’re playing the hand we’re dealt. Can you focus at all?”

“Somewhat.”

“Ok, the painting,” Dean said, trying to get them back on track. Cas wasn’t the only one affected by their surroundings, but he was pretty sure he had a higher tolerance than his friend. “Any idea what’s going on with it?” He felt Cas shift a bit and assumed he was trying to get another look at the picture. Worried, he pulled his head back a little so he could see his face. 

“The Acropolis?”

“Yeah,” Dean nodded. “Mean anything?”

Cas scrunched up his eyes but shook his head. “But the food in the dining room. It was standard fare in ancient Greece, among other places.”

“Ok, so Greece. Are you thinking some god or goddess? Aphrodite, maybe?”

“Dean,” Cas moaned. 

That didn’t sound good. Cas was gripping his shirt and gasping against his neck. Maybe they were getting close. “Stay with me.” He tried to think of everything he knew about Greek gods and goddesses and how it aligned with everything Cas had said, but it was getting harder to concentrate. With the dream couple on the other side of the room and their amazing stamina coupled with a warm, flustered Cas in his arms, his own libido was vying for attention. “What do you need?” he asked again. 

“I won’t be forced to do this,” Cas growled. 

“Hey, I promised not to cross any lines. I’m just trying to help.”

“Not you. Whatever is here is trying to drive us towards a sexual relationship, and I refused to be coerced.”

“So, you’re feeling….”

“Yes, Dean,” he snapped. “The heat is unbearable and just being close to you is barely containing it. I want more.”

Dean thought he knew what he was saying, and he would feel the same way. Cas had already had his feelings revealed once and he ran. This entire case had been an exercise in frustration and humiliation for his friend, and Dean worried this would drive a bigger wedge between them instead of bringing them together. “How do you want to play this?”

“Just give me a minute.” Cas took several deep breaths, and then stepped back out of Dean’s embrace. He snagged hold of Dean’s hand and threaded their fingers together. 

He was a mess. Dean wasn’t sure how much more Cas could endure. His face was flushed and his hair was damp and starting to curl. He could see the tiny tremors as Cas shook with the effort to withstand the onslaught. He wanted to go to him and help him, but at this point, he wasn’t sure where that line was. He considered kissing him again. That had worked a few minutes ago, and it might give Cas enough clarity to focus for a bit. He took a step forward only for Cas to hold up his free hand. 

“Please don’t. I can’t.”

“Cas,” he began only to be interrupted. 

“Don’t bother, Dean. He’s not going to change his mind.”

“Erica?” In that moment, he was so pissed at himself for not picking up on the fact that she was in the room with them and obviously more than just another guest at the inn. He didn’t know what she was, but he knew her appearance wasn’t coincidental, a fact that was verified when Cas took a menacing step towards her.

“Easy, tiger. We’re all friendly here.”

Dean moved closer to Cas and wrapped a protective arm around his waist. He still wasn’t looking so good, and Dean wasn’t sure how long he’d last in a fight. “Who are you?”

Erica waved her hand and the naked dream couple disappeared. She then waved her hand across her face. Dean watched as her features morphed, her delicate female attributes becoming more angular and distinctly male. 

“Himeros.”

“Hello, Castiel. Fancy running into you.”

Dean could feel the tension radiating off of Cas and knew that he was minutes away from exploding. While he was familiar with the name, he didn’t know off the top of his head why one of the Erotes would be screwing with them. “If you’re trying to get us to hook up, your technique sucks.”

“Who knew Castiel would be such a prude? He does have a reputation for being a rebel, a real bad boy. I thought you two would be knocking boots by now.”

“So, that’s it? You play mind games on unsuspecting couples?”

Himeros rolled his eyes and began walking around the small room. “Only one. The rules are clear. My brothers and I can only select one member of the couple, the one whose repressed desires and longing speak the loudest. We only play off of what’s already there. In your case, Castiel was the lucky winner.” 

“You had no right,” Cas spat, taking a step towards Himeros, only for Dean to place a restraining hand on his chest.

“Easy,” he told him in a calm voice, an emotion that he certainly wasn’t feeling. They needed to get out of this dreamscape, and then Dean would be more than happy to settle up with this guy. 

“How many people have you forced to act outside their will?”

“It’s funny you think you have the high road here, Castiel. I guess it doesn’t count if you just kill people outright.” 

“What do you want?” Dean asked. He was feeling just as hostile as Cas at the moment, but they weren’t holding any of the cards. Right now, his main objective was to protect Cas. 

“I guess I should be asking you that question, Castiel. After all, I’m only here to help. Your denial can only last for so long.”

“Release us now and leave this place.” 

Himeros laughed. “As if you have any power here. Look at you, panting and flushed like a dog in heat. How long do you think you can keep this up? As unappealing as your partner may be, he has still shown genuine affection and attraction for you, and yet, you would rather fall on your sword before giving in. You are a fool.”

“What do you want?” Dean practically snarled the question again, certain that he would not be able to restrain Cas much longer if Himeros kept talking.

“Nothing. My work here is done. You scoff at my offer of help and give nothing but threats and scorn in return. So I will leave, and you will live with the knowledge you were powerless, impotent even, and that the great Castiel has failed again.”

Before either of them could do anything, Himeros waved his hand and a smoky haze covered the room. Dean took a step back closer to Cas, trying to secure his hold on him, but it felt like he was grabbing air. 

“Dean!”

He gasped, his eyes shooting wide open as he crashed back to reality. He sat up and was relieved to see Cas lying next to him still asleep. Dean noted that he was no longer wearing the smock. He glanced around the room, taking in all the details that had changed in the dreamscape. The books and laptop were back on the nightstand, the sun was shining through the windows, and the clock read 11a.m. Dean wondered what else might have occurred as it hadn’t seemed like they’d spent 12 hours in the dream. 

“Hey Cas.” He shook his shoulder and tried to rouse him. “Hey man, wake up.” 

His eyes fluttered before slowly opening. It was such a contrast to how he’d woken that Dean began to wonder if all of it had been just a dream. He knew the minute Cas met his gaze that it hadn’t. Guilt and humiliation were present all over his features. 

Cas pushed himself up and scooted to the edge of the bed. He opened his mouth but didn’t utter a sound. 

“Cas.” Dean tried reaching a hand out towards him, but Cas got up and took a few steps back from the bed. 

“I’m fine. Are you?”

“Yeah, I’m good. So, this is real, right?” Dean asked. 

Cas looked around the room and then tilted his head and closed his eyes for a moment. “Yes. I believe Himeros is gone.”

“You feeling better? No more…?”

“I’m fine,” Cas said again, dropping is eyes to the floor. “It feels empty here, like there was a vacuum created. I don’t believe there is anything else we can do here.”

Dean wasn’t quite ready to walk away, but Cas looked as if he hadn’t slept in days. Whatever Himeros did to him, it took its toll on his friend. “Let’s pack up and head over to the motel. We’ll catch Sam up when we get there.”

Cas nodded, and began gathering up his things, not talking or even really acknowledging Dean. Each passing minute fed into Dean’s annoyance. Granted, Himeros had screwed with them, but he was hoping that he’d made some breakthrough with Cas. The ride across town was more of the same. His plan to talk to Cas before they met up with Sam was waylaid as Cas struggled to stay awake. 

He pulled into the parking lot, surprised to see Sam standing next to the Continental with the hood open. 

“Dean! You guys can’t answer your damn phones? I’ve been calling since last night?” Sam hobbled over to them, his words harsh even though his eyes were wide and shining with worry. “What the hell happened?”

“Long story. What happened here?” Dean nodded towards the car. 

“Are you kidding? I was coming to look for you, but it won’t start.”

“I’ll take a look at it later, and I’ll catch you up when we get inside.” Dean grabbed both of their duffels from the trunk and walked to the room, not bothering to see if anyone was following him. Now that they were officially off the case, weariness settled over him like a suffocating fog. He would take this small little budget suite over the fancy room at the inn any day. After that experience, he didn’t think he would ever want to stay in one of those places ever again. 

“So,” Sam began as he dropped into the chair by the table where his notes and laptop were spread all over the surface. “Is it over? I’ve been calling since last night. At first I assumed the storm had knocked out the connection, but then I figured something was blocking you guys.”

“And you were going to ride to the rescue with your one good leg?”

Sam rolled his eyes. “Someone had to come rescue the two of you.” He nodded his head towards Cas who had collapsed in the armchair by the window with his head tipped back and eyes closed. He arched an eyebrow, silently asking if Cas was all right. 

Dean shrugged. Hell if he knew anymore. “Himeros. Ancient Greek cupid and just as annoying as the angelic ones.”

“Understatement,” Cas muttered. 

Sam still looked confused, but Dean needed a moment. “You’ll get your details after I take shower. Right now, I just want to wash away this entire experience.” From the corner of his eye, he could see that Cas had moved, but he didn’t bother to turn back. He closed the bedroom door behind him, finally away from the weight of Sam’s curiosity and Cas’ disinterest.


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Unbeta'd so all mistakes are mine. Please feel free to let me know of any typos, and I'll gratefully correct them.

He stayed under the hot spray until the water ran cold. The heat relieved some of the tension, but he still felt as if he was tied up in knots. As soon as Sam was healed up, he was going after Himeros. If this was his brand of ‘helping,’ he wondered how many other lives he had destroyed. 

Any hopes he had of moving forward in a closer relationship with Cas had dried up and turned to dust. Cas had rejected his offers of help repeatedly as well as lied to him. He had made it quite clear that he no longer wanted Dean. 

He slipped on a long sleeve t-shirt and a well-worn pair of jeans before rejoining Sam in the outer room. He wasn’t surprised to see Cas gone. 

“He take off?” he asked as casually as possible, pulling a beer from the mini fridge and reclining on the sofa. 

“Isn’t that what you wanted? You stayed in there long enough.”

“Messed up case. Needed some time to think.” The beer cooled his throat, but he knew it would take something stronger for the numbness to kick in. 

“He got his own room,” Sam answered his earlier question. “Thought you’d want some time apart.”

Dean scoffed and took another long drag. 

“He told me some of what happened. Actually, he told me all the major points, but he was very detached. So what aren’t you guys telling me?”

“Case is over. What difference does it make now?”

“So I can grow and learn as a hunter, and because keeping secrets always causes more damage. Here.” Sam passed him a notebook. 

Dean scanned the list and noticed that Himeros was number three out of nine possibilities. He should have known Sam would put it together. 

“I did enough research on him to know he’s more like a trickster than a benevolent helper. You and Cas both look as if you’ve been rubbed raw. And we both know Cas doesn’t do well with opening up and dealing with what he’s feeling, so you need to take the lead on this.”

“I’m nowhere near drunk enough for this.”

“Fine. Then go get a bottle or two and get buzzed while you tell me. But pick up dinner first.”

It was a good idea. Dean wanted to talk to Sam, but like he said, he was raw. 

 

The town was slowly starting to come back to life after last night’s storm. Now that the streets were clean, businesses were opening back up and it didn’t take Dean long to pick up a couple of boxed meals as well as hit the liquor store. He returned to the room and settled in for an afternoon of drowning his sorrows. 

A couple of shots later, he started telling Sam about the past few days. 

“Well, that’s pretty much what Cas said but with more detail,” Sam mused after Dean filled him in. “What part bothers you the most?”

“The whole damn thing. Himeros got away. Cas got screwed with. Why choose just one thing?”

“It got personal and not with just Cas being targeted, but your relationship with him. Dean, you offered to have sex with him.”

“And he turned me down.”

“Do you blame him?”

“Thanks, Sammy. So glad I opened up to you.”

“Dean, he thought you were being influenced as well. He was trying to protect you, and even if he wasn’t, he wouldn’t want you offering something like that just to save him. It’s personal. Intimate.”

“Yeah, nothing at all like giving up one’s grace to save someone,” Dean sneered. 

“Dean, that’s” he trailed off for a moment. “No, you’re right. But if I was in Cas’ shoes, I would have been mortified.”

“Well I wouldn’t offer to sleep with you.” 

Sam rolled his eyes. “I meant even if he was someone who I cared about, I wouldn’t want to be seen that way. And unless he’s picked up some experience over the past few months, Cas doesn’t have much to go on. We’re not icons for healthy relationships, but at least we know how to interact on a physically intimate level.”

Dean poured himself another glass. He didn’t want to talk about this anymore. Maybe Sam was right, but none of that really made him feel better. 

“How much of this is about sex?”

“All of it. None of it.” Thankfully, Sam seemed to get what he was saying. 

“Does Cas know?”

Dean shrugged. “I told him.”

“Maybe you should tell him again now that you guys are away from the influence of the inn.”

Dean wasn’t sure he was ready to put himself out there again. “Why are you so pushy about this?”

“Cas has always been into you on some level. And right now, he’s in his room, all alone, trying to sort out his feelings. More than likely, he’ll either come to some warped resolution or bury his feelings or both. None of these options are in his best interest or yours. Now go take him some of this food, and the rest of the bottle. He’s in room 105.”

 

Dean knocked on the door, part of him wishing that Cas was asleep or just wouldn’t answer. Another part of him wanted to see him, though, and was relieved when he opened the door. He held up the bag of food and the bottle of whiskey as he walked into the room. He placed the food and drink on the table and glanced around. The room was just a double as opposed to the suite that they already had booked. 

“You should have just stayed with us.”

“I thought you might want some space.” 

Dean finally allowed himself to take a good look at Cas. He looked just as worn as he had earlier. The dark circles under his eyes were more pronounced, and he looked as if he were about to collapse. “Man, sit down before you keel over. Did you get any rest?”

Cas took a seat at the table and shook his head. He reached for the bottle, but Dean pulled it back towards his side of the table. 

“Nuh uh. Eat something first.” 

Cas scowled at him but reached into the bag and pulled out the takeout container. Dean waited until he had taken a few bites of the pasta before he retrieved two plastic cups and poured them both a drink. He sat in silence while Cas ate, neither of them willing to say the first word. He frowned when Cas pushed away the container but downed the rest of the contents of his glass. 

“You don’t eat enough.” Cas didn’t reply, and Dean didn’t stop him from refilling his glass. The silence continued between them as they sipped their drinks. Dean began to wonder why he even listened to Sam. He drained his glass and then stood up. He had made it to the door before Cas spoke. 

“Dean.”

He stopped although he really wasn’t sure he even wanted to hear what Cas was about to say.

“I’m sorry.”

“For what?” he asked. The anger bubbled up and spilled over. “Leaving? Not trusting me to help? Lying to me? What exactly is it that you’re sorry for?”

Cas stood up and moved into his space. The weariness was still there, but his features were now strained with anger. “What did you expect me to do? You made your feelings quite clear. We haven’t seen each other in months and …”

“And whose fault is that?” Dean cut in. “I’ve tried to reach out.”

“We haven’t seen each other in months,” Cas continued as if Dean hadn’t spoken, “and you offer to engage in a sexual encounter for the sake of a case.”

“Not for a case. For you. And we never got around to talking about exactly how far we were going. You never gave us the chance.” 

“It doesn’t matter. Everything was influenced by Himeros.”

“No,” Dean snapped. “I told you that I wasn’t under any influence. You were the only one being affected.”

“Erica?” 

“We only talked.”

Cas scoffed and shook his head. “Is your ego so big that you can’t even appreciate the fact that I didn’t want to take advantage?”

“Fine. But Himeros zeroed in on you. So how about all those repressed feelings that you denied ever having?”

The fight seemed to go out of Cas. “I didn’t…he was wrong.”

“Dude, I was there. Are you really going to try to tell me that wasn’t you?”

“Himeros got it wrong.”

Dean felt as if he’d been kicked in the gut. “Ok, then. Well, guess we’ll see you tomorrow. I’ll check out your car and then you’re free to…whatever.” This was why he never put himself out there. Sam’s words rang through his head, but he was tired as well. Maybe this wasn’t meant to be. 

“Dean.” Cas sighed and ran his hand across his face. He walked over to the table and poured two drinks. He nodded towards the glass and waited until Dean took a seat before sitting across from him. He took several sips as he seemed to be gearing up for what he wanted to say. 

“My feelings for you are difficult to define. After I left the bunker, I was hurt and tried not to think of you very often, at least not until I could only do so in a friendly manner. But I would be lying if I said that I only thought of you as a friend. I don’t have enough experience to clearly define it, but I can promise you that it’s nothing as graphic as what Himeros presented.”

Dean watched as Cas stammered through his explanation, redness staining his cheeks and throat. “It’s nothing to be ashamed of, man. Everyone gets the urge. It’s just natural, especially if you really into someone.”

“I don’t just get the urge,” Cas admitted. “Not like that.”

Dean thought back on all that had been said and done over the past few days and tried to piece together what Cas was saying. “So you don’t ever get horny?”

Cas seemed increasingly uncomfortable as he fidgeted with his glass. “Sometimes. In certain situations. I feel many things, but sexual desire is only part of it. I crave companionship and affection more. If I could have all that together, I suppose that would be ideal.”

“Why can’t you?”

“I have no reason to believe I can,” he replied with a pointed look. “I don’t have much experience, and what I do have, has not been pleasant. Himeros took my feelings for you and presented them in a way that is misleading and incomplete. And if I were to engage in a physical relationship with you, I would not want that decision to be forced due to another’s actions. For the sake of our friendship, I thought it best to not give in.”

“And what about now?”

“Now?”

“Yeah. Neither one of us is being influenced in any way. How do you feel now?”

Cas looked as if the question physically hurt him, but he lifted his chin and didn’t back down. “I think we should put this past us and move forward.”

“And I think you’re lying to me and yourself. You’re scared that I’m going to hurt you again, but I gotta tell you, man, you’re landing some pretty hefty blows yourself. But if that’s how you really feel, I’ll respect that. Tell me that you don’t want this, and I’ll never bring it up again, and I promise our friendship won’t suffer.”

“It’s for the best,” Cas told him. 

“That’s not what I said. Tell me you don’t want this, that you don’t want to try.”

“Dean….”

“Don’t lie to me.” He could tell that Cas was holding back, and this time he felt no compunction about pushing the other man. Cas was afraid, and Dean wasn’t about to throw away this chance out of fear. He wasn’t going to let them make the same mistake again. “Tell me.”

Cas was a stubborn son of a bitch. He glared at Dean and refused to speak a word. The standoff between them lasted several seconds, maybe minutes before Dean stood up and headed for the door. Anger coursed through him, but he wasn’t really sure if he was mad at himself, Cas, or Himeros for putting them in this damn situation. He just knew that his insides were boiling, and he needed to get out of this room before he did something he regretted. 

“Damn you. You tell me nothing will change and then you storm out of here. Who’s lying now?” 

Dean spun around and found that Cas had moved right up behind him. “Hey! I’m being honest with you.” 

“That is what you consider honest? You never even told me how you felt or what you wanted.”

“I’ve been telling you since I walked through the door.” They were so close, and Dean couldn’t remember what went through his mind right before he reached out and pulled Cas in for a kiss. He was long past the point of being gentle, and the kiss was more fire and roughness. The surprised squeak that Cas made only pushed him further and he dug his fingers into his hair, pulling just short of painfully. 

Cas wasn’t as skilled at kissing as Dean, but he was certainly making an effort to keep up. He parted his lips and allowed Dean to lick and taste him, his own tongue shyly meeting his at first before becoming more adventurous. Dean kissed along his jaw, reveling in the taste and feel of him. All thoughts fled from his mind except for the overpowering feeling of ‘mine.’

Without breaking contact, Dean walked them to the bed, giving Cas a little push backwards when his legs bumped the mattress. Dean followed him down, lowering himself on top of him, pressing their bodies close. He nuzzled along his neck while slipping his hand underneath Cas’ shirt. His fingertips danced over the tight muscles of his stomach before dipping down to tease at the waist of his jeans. 

Cas moaned and pushed up against him, but Dean pulled back. “Wait. Hold up.” 

“What?” Cas stared up at him. 

Dean thought he’d never looked better with his mussed hair and puffy lips. For so many years they had communicated with just a glance between them, and it would be so easy to do so now. The desire coursing through him was strong and pushing him towards completion, and he could see that Cas was feeling that same burn. But he reigned it in. There was too much riding on this moment. 

“I think we need to slow this down.” He hoped that the fact he was still holding Cas close to him would show that he wasn’t rejecting him, but Cas started to push away from him. 

“Hold up.” Dean tightened his arm around his waist and threw his leg over his. Cas could still push free if he wanted, but it was enough for Dean to show him that he wanted him to stay. “I want this. I really do, but I’m not about to be with you for the first time hot on the heels of all the shit that Himeros just pulled. It’s too fresh.”

Cas groaned and covered his face with his hand. He angled a bit away from Dean, not pulling free but putting a little distance between their bodies. 

“Hey,” he said, tugging on his arm. “Don’t hide from me. I’m not saying no, just not right now. Unless, you just, um, really need to get off.” He wasn’t sure that Cas wasn’t still being influenced in some way. He would give him whatever he needed, but he really wanted more than just a physical relationship. 

“Dean,” Cas sighed. “You don’t have to do this. I’ll be fine.”

“I’m not doing you any favors. You wanted to know how I felt, and I’m telling you. I want this, all of this, but I don’t want there to be any doubts in our minds as to why we’re doing this. No more mixed messages, no more guessing games, no more smoke screens.”

“Are you sure?” Cas asked, finally removing his hand to look at Dean. 

“I am. Are you?”

“I won’t be an obligation.”

“No more so than I am,” Dean replied. 

“Then yes. I’m sure.”

Dean pressed a quick kiss to his lips. “Then we’re together.”

“It’s that easy?” Cas asked. 

“I don’t know about easy, but it’s real,” Dean promised.


End file.
